Did You Hear About The Sasquatch? | Mugdhaa Ranade

Magda Ehlers via Pexels

In summer, the Sasquatch met a Kumquat Orchardist moonbathing naked underneath the fragrant white blooms, messily gorging on a sandwich, the cheese dripping down her chin. A lover of sasquatch erotica and the romance in The Shape Of Water, she offered herself to the Sasquatch immediately.

They married, surrounded by ripe kumquats and paparazzi.

In winter, the Orchardist sought an annulment, claiming fraud: the Sasquatch was a human male on stilts in a fursuit.

In spring, an exposé appeared: the Orchardist wanted fame, the not-Sasquatch, the kumquat orchard; it was a sham marriage.

In summer, the orchard was replaced by a large crater.

Aboard the spaceship, as the orchard flourished and the fruit ripened, the not-Sasquatch shed its human skin. Out tumbled beings no bigger than the kumquats they began to feast upon.

Mugdhaa Ranade wakes up everyday hoping to find dry leaves to crunch underfoot, and stray cats to pet. She can be found in person in Mumbai, India, and online on Twitter @swxchhxnd.

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